The Talkshow Show
by Agent Bambi
Summary: The MWPP gang, along with Lily, Lucius, Snape and some others, are interview about some, er - rather personal questions.
1. Which Underwear do YOU prefer?

**The Talkshow Show**

**Genre** Humor/Talk show

**Rating** PG-13  
**Summary** Bambi (that's me) interviews Lily, James, Sirius, Remus, Snape, Lucius, etc. about some, er- rather _personal_ questions.

**Disclaimer **This story is based on characters and situations created and owned by JK Rowling, various publishers including but not limited to Bloomsbury Books, Scholastic Books and Raincoast Books, and Warner Bros., Inc. No money is being made and no copyright or trademark infringement is intended. All other aspects of the story, unless otherwise claimed, belong to moi.

**A/N: **Written back in '01 during my carefree and innocent days smirks Okay, maybe not...

**Which Underwear do YOU prefer?**

**Bambi** Welcome to the 101st episode of THE TALKSHOW SHOW!

**[clapping and cheering echoes through the room] **

**Bambi** I am your host, Bambi.

**[Even louder clapping and cheering echoes through the room] **

**Bambi** I now present to you our guests for this evening – James Potter, Lily Evans, Sirius Black, Remus Lupin, Lucius Malfoy aaaand - Severus Snape!

**[crowd cheers] **

**Bambi** And today's topic is...

**Audience [roars]** _Which Underwear Do YOU prefer? _

**Bambi** Yes, that's right. We are going to ask each of our guests _which_ underwear they prefer to wear! At the end of the show, we will find out the most popular underwear! **[clears throat] **Our first victim –er- guest for tonight, James Potter – which underwear does it for you?

**James [grins around]** Well, I think I'll go with boxers, thanks. They're very comfortable, and I'm a man who lives for comfort. That, and I find them to be very spacious, if you catch my drift, ladies **[winks at the ladies in the audience who are throwing their own underwear at him]**

**Audience [chants]** James needs space! James needs space!

**Bambi** Our next question is directed to Remus Lupin. Remus, which underwear do _you_ wear?

**Remus [blushes] **Must I say this in front of... **[looks around at audience] **so many people?

**Bambi** Yes! You certainly do!

**Remus [still blushing]** I wear... oh, what the hell! I wear... briefs! There! I said it! **[grins happily]**

**Bambi** Okay... um, next person – Lily?

**Lily [smiles] **Would you believe me if I told you I wear... **[leans in for secrecy] **nothing?

**[crowd goes wild]**

**Lily** Well, bad luck, because I always like to wear my _thong_!

**[crowd goes wild again] **LILY! LILY! LILY! LILY!

**Bambi [ignores audience]** Sirius Black? What underwear do _you_ prefer?

**Sirius **I prefer whatever my _lady_ prefers me to wear! **[winks roguishly] **Even if that involves wearing nothing!

**Audience [roars]** SIRIUS IS A SLAVE TO HIS LADY?

**Bambi **Okay, that's enough now, next person. we have the luscious Lucius! May I call you Luci?

**Lucius [drawls]** No, you may not. But, yeah, I wear boxers. With the Malfoy logo on them, of course. Though sometimes... I have to admit that I go commando. **[beams at audience]**

**Audience [screams]** LUCIUS! LUCIUS! LUCIUS! LUCIUS! ...

**Bambi** How many times do I have to tell you – QUIET! Next, we have Severus Snape.

**[Snape appears to be very well groomed] **

**Sirius [laughs]** Wow! I see you got the shampoo I sent in the mail!

**Snape [narrows eyes]** DIE, dog boy!

**[Snape bounces onto Sirius and attempts to rip his hair out] **

**Bambi [looks amused]** Now, now, behave yourselves, gentlemen!

**Snape [growls]** Grrr!

**Bambi** So, Sevie, what underwear do you prefer?

**Snape [screams angrily]** Call me Sevie again and DIE!

**Bambi** Okay, _Severus_, which underwear do you wear?

**Snape [growls again]** I'm not telling!

**Bambi** Why not?

**Snape** Well, do you really want to know what's separating you and me?

**Bambi** Actually, yes. Tell me.

**Snape** Boxers, of course.

**Bambi** **[nods distractedly] **Right, right. Do we have anyone else?

**Archie** ME!

**Bambi** Me? Who is me?

**Archie** Why, it's me, Archie!

**Bambi** Uh, all right, then, Archie, what underwear do you wear?

**Archie** I like to wear nothing; I like a healthy breeze around my privates, thanks!

**Bambi [smirks]** ARCHIE! You bad boy, you.

**Audience** ARCHIE! ARCHIE! ARCHIE! ARCHIE! ...

**Bambi [now really pissed off]** SHUT UP!

**[Everyone is quiet] [noise of pin dropping can be heard]**

**Bambi [feeling uncomfortable]** Uh, well, that's all folks!

**Audience** FOLKS! FOLKS! FOLKS! ...

**Bambi [now really, really pissed off]** SHUT THE **[long beep is heard] **UP!

**[Everyone is silent once more]**

**Bambi** Thank you, and see you next week on... THE TALKSHOW SHOW!

**Audience** TALKSHOW! TALKSHOW! TALKSHOW! TALKSHOW! ...

**Bambi [gives them a deadly stare]** And, now, we have to say goodnight, but we _will_ see you later! Say hi to your mum for me!

**Audience** BAMBI! BAMBI! BAMBI! ...

**A/N: **Be a dear and review, c'mon.


	2. Kiss me, Kiss me

**The Talkshow Show**

**Genre** Humor/Talk show

**Rating** PG-13  
**Summary** Bambi (that's me) interviews Lily, James, Sirius, Remus, Snape, Lucius, etc. about some, er- rather _personal_ questions.

**Disclaimer **This story is based on characters and situations created and owned by JK Rowling, various publishers including but not limited to Bloomsbury Books, Scholastic Books and Raincoast Books, and Warner Bros., Inc. No money is being made and no copyright or trademark infringement is intended. All other aspects of the story, unless otherwise claimed, belong to moi.

**A/N: **Written back in '01 during my carefree and innocent days smirks Okay, maybe not...

**Chapter Two: Kiss me, Kiss me**

**Bambi [screaming]: **Welcome to the 102nd show of THE TALKSHOW SHOW!

**::Clapping and cheering echoes through the room:: **

**Bambi: **I am your host, Bambi.

**::Even louder clapping and cheering echoes through the room:: **

**Bambi:** Tonight's topic is ...

**Audience [roars]:** WHICH KISS!

**Bambi:** Yes, that's right; tonight's topic is wh-

**Audience [roars again]:** WHICH KISS!

**Bambi [getting annoyed]:** WE KNOW THAT'S THE TOPIC! Now, for tonight's GUESTS!

**::Clapping and cheering is heard throughout the room:: **

**Bambi: **Remus Lupin! Peter Pettigrew! Lily Evans! Sirius Black! Severus Snape! Lucius Malfoy, Aaand ... JAMES POTTER!

**Audience:** WHOOOHOOO!

**Bambi:** Okay, Remie, what's your favorite kiss?

**Remus [blushing]:** Please don't call me Remie...

**Bambi:** Okay, Remi – err, Remus! What's your favorite kiss?

**Remus [whispers]:** I think that the Eskimo Kiss is pretty cute!

**Audience:** SAY WHAT?

**Bambi:** He said: 'I think that the Eskimo Kiss is pretty cute!'

**Audience:** OH! Riiight...

**Bambi:** Okay, next person ... Lily Evans!

**Audience:** Lily _Evans?_

**Bambi:** We have traveled in time, so she is the FUTURE Lily Potter!

**Lily:** HA! Yeah right!

**Bambi:** Lily, which kiss?

**Lily**: You can call me 'Lil!' Uh, my fave kiss would have to be ...

**::Audience is quiet for once:: **

**Lil:** The French kiss!

**Bambi:** Hehe, me too! Why'd you choose it, though?

**Lil:** Oh, I don't know, I guess it's romantic.

**Audience:** Awww.

**Bambi [smiling]:** Sirius?

**Sirius:** I would definitely have to say – TONSIL HOCKEY! Yeah, baby!

**Audience [roars]:** SIRIUS! SIRIUS! SIRIUS! ...

**Bambi:** That's enough!

**Audience: **

**Bambi:** So, you mean like a French kiss?

**Sirius:** Uh, yeah, but more tongue than that!

**Bambi [confused]: **More tongue?

**Sirius: **YEAH! _Way_ more tongue.

**Bambi:** Well, why do you like it so much?

**Sirius [pauses and thinks]:** Uh, I don't know, its just fun! Very fun, if ya get me.

**::Sirius winks roguishly at the audience:: **

**Bambi: **Okay, Jamsie?

**James:** James.

**Bambi:** Oh, sorry ... James. Which kiss?

**James:** MAKING OUT!

**Audience [screams]:** JAMES! JAMES! JAMES! ...

**Bambi:** Hehe, well, James, why did you choose that answer?

**James:** Its REALLY fun! It can involve ALL kisses ... and that's good, coz there are lots!

**Bambi: **Good point.

**Audience:** JAMES! JAMES! JAMES! JAMES! ...

**Bambi:** I said ... ENOUGH! Well, since that was a pretty short episode, we'll add another question ... 'Who would you want to kiss, using that kiss that you said?'

**Audience: **JAMES! JAMES! JAMES! ...

**Bambi:** Honestly! I said STOP!

**Everyone: **

**Bambi:** That's better. Okay, Remus, who would you want to give a, erm - an Eskimo Kiss to?

**Remus: **

**Bambi:** Remuuus? Wakey wakey!

**Remus [blushing]: **

**Bambi:** Earth to Remus – Can you hear me?

**Remus:** ?em reah ouy naC – sumeR ot htraE

**Bambi:** WHAT?

**Sirius:** He talks backwards when he's embarrassed.

**Bambi:** Oh, then I'll ask later. Lily?

**Lily:** I said to call me 'Lil!'

**Bambi:** Okay, Lil.

**Lil [whispers]:** Uh, James.

**Bambi [the only one that heard]: **Yeah, don't we all? Next, Sirius?

**Sirius:** YOU!

**Bambi:** Me?

**Sirius:** Yeah! Coz you are so sexy!

**Bambi:** Me!? Hey, I'm not one to complain, though. James?

**James:** LILY EVANS!

**Lil [surprised is an understatement]:** ME?!

**Bambi:** I know, guys are weird ... suddenly they seem like you!

**::Bambi looks over at Sirius:: **

**Lil [repeats]:** ME? You wanna MAKE OUT with ME?

**James [shrugs]:** Yeah, I've always liked you! So why not?

**Lil:** Okay.

**Bambi:** Now, this is what the show is about, people getting together!

**Sirius [looks at me saucily]:** It is?

**Bambi [winks]:** No, but it is now ...

**::Everyone looks at Lily and James who are making out on the floor:: **

**Bambi:** Remus, have you decided yet?

**Remus:** Yes.

**Bambi [getting impatient]:** WHO?

**Remus: _You_. **

**Bambi [once again the only one that heard]:** ME?

**Sirius:** SHE'S MINE!

**Remus:** NO! MINE!

**Bambi [sounding amused]:** Boys! Boys!

**::Sirius leaps over and kisses Bambi:: **

**Bambi [smiling]:** Now that was some SERIOUS TONSIL HOCKEY!

**Audience:** WHOOOHOO!

**Remus:** Grrrr ....

**::Remus pull Sirius off Bambi and gives her an Eskimo Kiss:: **

**Bambi:** Um, that Eskimo Kiss was very ... err... sweet?!

**Remus [missing the sarcasm]:** Thanks!

**Bambi:** No prob, baby.

**::Bambi looks down onto the watch on her hand:: **

**Bambi:** Oh! Already ten o'clock? Well, it's the end of the show. Good Night!

**Audience:** Aww!

**Lil:** Oh!

**James:** Lily, will you marry me?

**Lil:** It's Lil. And, yes!

**Sirius:** That was quick!

**Remus:** Yeah!

**Bambi:** Very quick!

**Lil:** Well, what's the point of waiting?

**James:** Exactly!

**Bambi [asks the audience]:** Do you think next week we should have a special WEDDING show? Maybe Lil and James could get married here? Live!

**Audience:** YAY!

**Lil and James:** OKAY!

**Sirius [seconds before Remus]:** I'm the best man.

**Remus:** I'm the – Oh ...

**Sirius:** Ha!

**Remus [scowling at Sirius]:** Well, I didn't want to be best man anyway!

**Sirius:** Yeah, right!

**Remus: **

**Sirius:** Hey, where's Peter?

**Peter:** Right here.

**Sirius:** How'd you get here so quick?

**Peter: **I was here all along!

**Everyone [except for Peter]:** You were?!

**Peter:** Yes! And my favorite kiss is a French kiss, too, although I've never actually done it ...

**Bambi:** Who would you want to kiss?

**::Peter smiles sweetly at Bambi:: **

**Bambi:** Me?

**Peter [whispers]:** YES! I've always dreamt of this moment.

**::Peter puckers up his lips, closes his eyes and stumbles towards Bambi:: **

**Bambi [while running for her life]:** WELL, AS I SAID BEFORE, IT'S THE END OF THE SHOW, AND I HAVE TO UH, GO _SOMEWHERE_ ... I THINK ... BYE!

**A/N: **C'mon R&R, or I'll set Peter on you!


	3. Do you hear Wedding Bells? I do

**The Talkshow Show**

**Genre** Humor/Talk show

**Rating** PG-13  
**Summary** Bambi (that's me) interviews Lily, James, Sirius, Remus, Snape, Lucius, etc. about some, er- rather _personal_ questions.

**Disclaimer **This story is based on characters and situations created and owned by JK Rowling, various publishers including but not limited to Bloomsbury Books, Scholastic Books and Raincoast Books, and Warner Bros., Inc. No money is being made and no copyright or trademark infringement is intended. All other aspects of the story, unless otherwise claimed, belong to moi.

**A/N: **Written back in '01 during my carefree and innocent days smirks Okay, maybe not...

**Chapter Three: Do you hear Wedding Bells? I do!**

**Bambi [screaming]: **Welcome to the 103rd show of THE TALKSHOW SHOW!

**::Clapping and cheering echoes through the room::**

**Bambi:** I am your host for this evening, Bambi.

**::Even louder clapping and cheering echoes through the room (as usual):: **

**Bambi: **Tonight's topic is ...

**Audience [roars]:** WEDDING

**::Clapping and cheering is heard throughout the room:: **

**Bambi:** The lucky couple of tonight's special Wedding Episode is: Lily Evans and James Potter.

**Audience:** WHOOOHOOO!

**Bambi:** How do you feel about being on TV for your wedding night?

**James [smiles at Lily]:** I'm not really sure what TV is, but all I care is that I'm with Lily.

**Bambi [pretends to gag]:** This is too lovey-dovey for me!

**Audience [boos at Bambi]:** Boo! Boo!

**Bambi: **Fine, fine, we'll go on with the show!

**Audience:** On with the show! On with the show! On with the show!

**Bambi [makes a 'shhh'ing noise]:** Alright, already. Quiet. Now, we have invited their friends, and some other people they might enjoy being with. Here they are: Remus Lupin! Peter Pettigrew! Sirius Black! Severus Snape! Lucius Malfoy, Aaand ... Albus Dumbledore!

**::As each of their names is called, they run onto the stage:: **

**James [a little pissed off]:** SEVERUS SNAPE? WHY'D YOU INVITE HIM?

**Bambi [smiles wickedly]:** Oh, I thought you were _friends!_

**Sirius:** You thought wrong!

**Bambi [ignores him and reads off a little piece of paper]:** Let's introduce our bridesmaids! Allie McBain, Minnie House aaand ... Remus Lupin!

**Remus:** What? I'm not a _bridesmaid!_

**Bambi [looks back at her little piece of paper]:** But it says right here ...

**Remus:** Well I'm _not_ a bridesmaid!

**Bambi [smiling]:** Would you settle for a bridesman?

**Remus [sighs]:** Yeah, I suppose.

**Audience [roars]:** REMUS! REMUS! REMUS! ...

**Bambi:** That's enough!

**Audience: **

**Bambi:** And for the best man tonight ... Sirius Black!

**Someone in the audience**: GO SIRIUS!

**Sirius [bows deeply]:** Thank you, thank you.

**Bambi [confused]:** Alright then ...

**Sirius:** Do all the ladies in the audience love me?

**All the ladies in the audience:** YES! WE LOVE YOU!

**Bambi:** Okay, let's start the wedding!

**Radio:** Dun, dun, dun, dun ... dun, dun, dun, dun ...

**Audience [hums to the music]:** Hum, hum, hum, hum ... hum, hum, hum, hum ...

**::Lily walks up the aisle, looking absolutely smashing in her white prostitute suit:: **

**RRRRRRIIIIIIIIPPPPP!!! wrong script, sorry ...**

**::Lily walks up the aisle, looking absolutely fabulous in her white wedding dress:: **

**Audience [coos]:** Aww, isn't she sweet?

**Bambi [doubling as the minister ... well, ministress]: **Do you, James Potter, take Lily Evans to be your awfully wedded –

**Remus the bridesman [interrupts]:** It's _lawfully, _not_ awfully_!

**Bambi [continues]:** Sorry, to be your lawfully wedded wife, for life?

**All the guys in the audience**: I do.

**Bambi:** I said James Potter!

**James [laughs]: **I do

**Bambi [smirks]:** Do you, Lily Evans take James Potter to be your lawfully wedded wife?

**Lil:** I do.

**Bambi [laughs crazily]:** You just said you were getting to a _female_ James Potter

**Audience [obviously not impressed]: **How lame ... who does she think she is? ... pulling those kind of tricks ... shame on her!

**Bambi:** Fine, I'm sorry. I pronounce you wife and wife.

**::Bambi laughs:: **

**Everyone else [fuming]:** That was not funny, Bambi! Stop ruining the wedding!

**Bambi:** Alright, alright, I pronounce you man and wife. You may kiss the bride.

**::The lights suddenly go off, as James embraces Lily:: **

**Bambi:** Who did that? Carl? No, wait, you're the camera guy ... who's the lighting technician? Oh yeah, Manny! TURN IT BACK ON!

**::All the lights suddenly go on then off again:: **

**Everyone [groans]:** Oh, Manny!

**::The lights go on again:: **

**Manny [in a high, nasal voice, resembling Fran Drescher's]:** Sorr-ee. Can't you people accept a joke?

**Lil:** Uh, James. Why are you kissing Allie McBain?

**James [opens his eyes]:** Oh! Shit, how did that happen?

**Sirius [grins evilly]:** I don't know.

**Bambi [jokes]:** Already cheating ... you should at least wait a few days!

**Audience:** Ooh!

**James [close to hysterics]:** I am not!

**Lily:** You can call me Lil

**Everyone [confused]:** What's that got to do with anything?

**Bambi:** Erm, let's continue with the show ... James, Lily, Lil, sorry ... where are you planning to go for a honey moon?

**Lil [at the same time as James]:** Paris!

**James:** New York!

**:: Look at each other then laugh:: **

**Bambi:** How about going to both? Or maybe a trip around the world?

**Lil:** Okay, sure ... why not?

**James:** Yep, I'm in!

**Bambi:** Okie-dokie, next question. Are you planning to have any little ones?

**Lil and James [together]:** Yes.

**Bambi:** Would you prefer a girl or a boy?

**Lil:** Either one – we'll love them the same.

**Bambi:** Any names picked out?

**James:** I was thinking Karen and Michael.

**Lil:** Well, _I_ was thinking more like ... Harold and Harriet!

**Bambi [looking at the disagreeing couple]:** Well?

**James:** Harold ... I like that, but Harriet? Really, Lil ...

**Lil:** What's wrong with Harriet?

**James:** Well, honey, people will be calling her Harriet the spy, I'm sure she wouldn't really like that.

**Bambi:** Oh, I definitely agree ... Harriet, a disgusting name!

**Lil [raises an eyebrow]:** It was my mother's.

**Bambi:** Uh, sorry, did I say disgusting? I meant fabulously fantastic!

**Sirius [giggles]:** Caught out!

**Bambi [sarcastically]:** Thanks for that, Sirius, I didn't notice!

**James:** And, I don't really like the name Harold, it's a little old fashioned. How about Harry, instead?

**Lil:** Oh my God. Its perfect.

**Sirius:** Yeah, I like it, too!

**Remus:** Me three!

**Bambi:** Yes, it _does_ have a certain something ...

**Snape [laughing at his own joke]:** Yeah ... a certain _stupidity!_

**James:** Shut up, Snape, no one cares what _you_ think!

**Bambi [asks the audience]:** What do _you _think?

**Audience:** HARRY! HARRY! HARRY! HARRY!

**Lil and James:** Harry it is, then!

**Bambi [wiggles eyebrows]:** When are you gonna ... uh, start making the baby?

**James [looks over at Lily (uh, I mean Lil)]:** Well, I don't mind if we start now ...

**Sirius:** Can I help? It can be an orgy ... it'll be real fun!

**James [scowling at Sirius]:** I don't think so, Sirius.

**Sirius [innocently staring back]:** I was just kidding!...

**Snape:** The name Harry is gay I'm telling you!

**Sirius:** _You're_ gay!

**Remus: **What's wrong with being gay?

**::Snape stalks out of the room in a huffy:: **

**Bambi:** Albus? What do you think about the name?

**Dumbledore:** I think Harry is a fine choice. I myself would have chosen it.

**::Sybil Trelawney enters the room:: **

**Bambi [in a fake cheery voice]:** Hello, Syb.

**Trelawney:** Good evening. I had a strange urge to consult the orb yesterday morning, and I Saw that the child's name will be, in fact, not Harry, but Neville Longbottom.

**Bambi [so Trelawney can't hear]:** I think she'd better consult her orb again ...

**Bambi [looks at her watch and mutters]:** We'll have to go overtime ...

**A/N: **TBC in...The Wedding Episode: OVERTIME! Review please!


	4. Wedding Episode: OVERTIME!

**The Talkshow Show**

**Genre** Humor/Talk show

**Rating** PG-13  
**Summary** Bambi (that's me) interviews Lily, James, Sirius, Remus, Snape, Lucius, etc. about some, er- rather _personal_ questions.

**Disclaimer **This story is based on characters and situations created and owned by JK Rowling, various publishers including but not limited to Bloomsbury Books, Scholastic Books and Raincoast Books, and Warner Bros., Inc. No money is being made and no copyright or trademark infringement is intended. All other aspects of the story, minus the songs which belong to their respective artists, belong to moi.

**A/N: **Written back in '01 during my carefree and innocent days smirks Okay, maybe not...

**Chapter Four: The Wedding Episode: OVERTIME!**

**Bambi: **Alright, let's continue the special -

**Audience [roars]:** WEDDING EPISODE! OVERTIME!

**::Clapping and cheering is heard throughout the room:: **

**Bambi:** Now, where were we?

**Someone in the Audience: **You were about to tell Trelawney that she should consult her orb again!

**Bambi:** Yes, Sybil, dear, the name will _not_ be Will Potter, I assure you. Hasn't your orb told you I come from the future?

**Trelawney: **But the orb clearly told me it would be Will!

**Audience [roars]:** SHUT UP!

**Peter [looks up at Bambi with a puppy-dog face:** Um, Bambi, can I please go pee-pee?

**Bambi [rolls eyes]:** Yeah, up the hall, third door on the left, then go to the door that says 'Men's'.

**::Suddenly, Voldemort Apparates into the room::**

**Voldemort:** I have come to kill you all!

**Bambi [snorts]:** You and what army?

**Voldemort: **Avada Kedavra!

**Bambi:** You stupid idiot, you were supposed to point your wand at me. Here I'll show you.

**::Bambi grabs Voldemort's wand::**

**Bambi [points wand at Voldemort]:** Avada Kedavra!

**::Nothing happens, then ...::**

**Voldemort:** Ow! What did you do that for? It hurt!

**Bambi:** You're supposed to die!

**Voldemort [cackles evilly]:** No one can kill me, for I am Lord Voldemort!

**Bambi:** Look, Voldie, you're being up yourself. That won't win you any friends.

**Voldemort [furious]:** What did you say?

**Bambi [repeats]:** I said, you're being up yourself. That won't win you any friends.

**Voldemort:** AVADA KEDAVRA!

**Audience [laughs when nothing happens]:** She's still got your wand!

**::Voldemort disapparates::**

**Bambi:** Did he actually manage to hurt anyone?

**Sirius**: Look, he stepped on that ant over there ... but wait, would you believe it, its still alive!

**::Audience roars with laughter::**

**::Suddenly, the room plunges into total darkness::**

**Bambi:** Manny?

**Manny:** I didn't do it. You're always accusing me!

**Bambi:** ROOMOS LUMOS!

**::The lights go on again. Somehow, everyone is on the other side of the room and Allie McBain and Minnie House are lying on the floor, dead::**

**Everyone [screams]:** Aah! It was Voldemort! Aah!

**Bambi [trying to distract everyone]:** Um, how about an after party?

**Everyone:** YEAH!

**Bambi:** Now, lets put on the music and get down!

**::Bambi puts on the radio again::**

**Radio:** Dun, dun, dun, dun ...

**Bambi [twiddles with the tuner]:** Sorry about that ...

**Radio [playing Britney Spears]:** You tell me you're in love with me, like you can't take you pretty eyes away from me. It's not that I don't wanna stay, but every time you come too close I move away. I wanna believe in everything that you say, coz it sounds _so_ good, but if you really want me, move slow. There's things about me you just have to know. Sometimes I run ...

**Audience:** BOO! BOO!

**::Bambi twiddles with the radio tuner again::**

**Radio [playing Britney again]:** ... Oh baby, baby, how was I supposed to know that somethin' wasn't right? Oh, baby, baby, I shouldn't have let you go and now you're right outside, yeah. Show me, how you want it to be, tell me baby, coz I need to know how. My loneliness is killin' me. [And I] I must confess, I still believe [still believe]. When I'm not with you I lose my mind. Gimme a sign, hit me baby one more time!

**Audience:** BOO! BOO!

**Bambi [plays with the radio's tuner again]:** Alright, alright, here we go, some _real_ music!

**Radio [Vitamin C]:** As we go on, we remember, all the times we had together. And as our lives change, come whatever, we will still be, friends forever ...

**Everyone [groans]:** Bambi!

**Bambi [puts on a CD instead]:** Alright, here we go!

**CD Player [J.Lo and Ja Rule]:** I met so many men and it's like their all the same, my appetite for lovin', is now my hunger pain.  
And when I'm feelin' sexy, who's gonna come for me? My only problem is, their insecurity.  
**Lil [grins]:** Finally, a good song!

**Bambi [jokes]:** Yeah, but then again, _anything's_ better than Britney Spears! Or Vitamin C ...

**Audience:** BOO VITAMIN C AND BRITNEY SPEARS! BOO! BOO!

**James [smiles at Lil]:** Wanna dance?

**Lil [smiles back]:** Definitely.

**Everyone [to Someone Else]:** Wanna dance?

**Someone Else [to Everyone]:** Definitely.

**::Everyone is dancing happily with Someone Else::**

**Sirius:** Hey, Bambi, wanna dance with me?

**Bambi:** Okay, sure ... why not?

**Remus:** Can I dance with you next?

**Bambi:** Of course.

**::Bambi dances with Sirius then with Remus::**

**Peter:** Would you like to dance with _me, _Bambi?

**Bambi:** No, I wouldn't!

**[A while later] Bambi:** Well, its time for the end of the Overtime, but we'll see you next week ... in The Talkshow Show!

**Audience:** Woohoo! Next week!

**Bambi:** But now we'll have one last song, sung by none other than ... ME!

**Everyone [covers ears]:** Uh-oh!

**Bambi [starts singing]:** Lily and James, sitting in a tree, K-I-S-S-I-N-G. First comes the love, then comes the marriage, then comes baby Harry in a little blue carriage! GO LILY AND JAMES!

**Audience:** KISS! KISS! KISS!

**::Lily and James kiss one more time::**

**Bambi:** I am your host, Bambi. Goo--

**::Peter crashes into the set, knocking everything over::**

**Bambi: **PETER! I'LL KILL YOU! THAT WAS MY ONLY SET! I'LL CHOP OFF YOUR censored AND SHOVE IT UP YOUR censored YOU censored mother censored COME BACK HERE!

**-fin-**

**A/N: **That's all for now, but maybe if I get some more **reviews** I might considering continuing this...


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